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What sort of car twat are you?

September 13, 2018 8:49 AM
11 0
What sort of car twat are you?

You have a decent income but hate spending money so you drive a 90s Golf or ancient Volvo that leaves a plume of black smoke like a squid under attack. You’re such a tightarse you’ll endure endless breakdowns until it completely falls apart like a clown car.

You love people staring at your Porsche Spyder or Aston Martin. Sadly the kudos quickly wears off whenever you get out and everyone realises you’re a portly middle-aged businessman in ironed jeans who’s been rocking out to Chris Rea.

You drive a Beemer or Merc. You like to imagine you look like a successful drug dealer. You are not. You work in a shop and are skint as usual so you’re driving over for dinner at your mum’s yet again.

You lurch around the streets in an uninsured 1980s Ford Escort with no MOT or hubcaps. Other drivers dread an accident with you, but to be honest a minor bump will probably reduce your ride to a pile of rust flakes and old Shakin’ Stevens cassette.

Source: thedailymash.co.uk

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